Nothings bad has happened, on the contrary something good has happened, I just can't put it into words that do it justice.
Josh and I have been spending a lot of time together lately... And ya know, I really don't even have to elaborate more on that, it's pretty self explanatory.
We've kissed and now it puts our friendship beyond boundaries. I've always wanted this, I've had a crush on him since the beginning of our friendship... it went away for a while but it decided to recede into the darkest corners of my head to be lifted out again.
Where this is going to go, I don't know. It's way too early to tell.
I can't go fast with this though. I made that mistake with two guys. Josh is different anyways, we were(are?) friends. This takes a whole different set of rules. Well, maybe not rules per say... Maybe definition?
It's nice to feel giddy for a change. I'm blushing like mad every time I think about the other night. I haven't blushed in so long... It's a good and an uneasy feeling. I've never liked myself vulnerable.
My thoughts right now are just racing, I can't hold onto a thought long enough to get it down. So this is whatever comes to mind.
We're keeping our hook up(that's such a bad way to describe it...) from our co-workers. I even told Claire a while ago never to date someone from work. Granted Josh was the one that got me the job and I've known him before hand... I still work with him. Yay for me for ignoring my own advice...
Last night was just a rough night as the previous one( Josh and I looked and felt as if we were in a car wreck, we had no sleep, we were shocked emotionally... there's always another side to a coin). I had the hardest time falling asleep. Pillows and blankets are never good substitutes for a person. All I wanted was his arm around me...
Now it's time for me to go to work... We're going an Anime night with our friend and co-worker Anna. We'll see how things go.
chez