Ace of Hearts still burns...
06.04.02 - 7:39 am
hola... well i've thought over my semi-relationship... in reality.. we have no relationship.. it's just us having crushes!! But we each know about 'em... We haven't even gone out on a date and we act like a couple.. For a person who's never had a b-f.. this is kinda wierd. I don't know if i should cut the whole thing off. Yet i really would like to go out w/ him... tis soo confusing!! But! If he gives me any more shit about how i need to get a out and have a life in order to be sane.. i'm going to kill him. My life consists of eat, sleep, swim, and being on the 'puter for atleast and hr or more a day. Tis it. That's my life. It's a meager life, but it's mine, and i'm happy. But then He comes into my life, and just disrupts my order. So now i have to include him in there for him to feel wanted. One, i'm 18 he's 16... I'm not comfortable about the age diff.. Two i'm not comfortable showing that i like him infront of ppl quite yet.. Three... I've never had a boy friend!! That should say it all!! Four... If i'm not in a relationship yet.. why do i have to deal w/ all these probs that come w/ it!! Shouldn't arguing come During the relationship?? Not Before!! There is a plus tho.. being called cute.. And Erika.. i'm not including you in the "cute" saying cuz you're a friend... this is something different, so deal ;p Oh and yeah.. if i do go out w/ him.. i need to tell my mom... my mom is like my bestfriend btw.. i tell her everything.. but i'm having a hard time even telling her.. i want to.. but i'm scared to. And i'd like to know if this does form into some kind relationship before telling her... I liked my life simple before this... damn him.. and yet it's nice to be noticed by someone. Oh And Five!! I'm going to college late this summer, what happens if this does turn into a relationship?! =( So many things complicate my life.. why couldn't i have known him sooner...
~Chez