Siiigh.
It seems that this week fucking sucks for everyone...
Friends going through things and coming to me.
Am i stable enough to have it all pile on me? It's hard, i want to help, want to scream. Concentrate on anything But me...
I love days like these. Where i can't get out of bed because i'm too tired, i hate my first class... miss it. Make it to my second... have to cheat to get through a quiz. 3rd class, as soon as i walk in i mutter, "someone just kill me now."
I just want to sleep forever. Dream forever. But even then they scary me...
My friend Ty told me about her molestation by a close friend that happened last year.
I dreamed it happened to me.
I remember lying in bed, don't know who's bed... and the guy had his hand on my butt, rubbing up and down going under the straps of my underwear.
Today i couldn't understand why i was sore. My shoulders hurt, my sides hurt...
I must have been so tense.
But i wasn't scared. But it was wrong.
I had other dreams... i can't remember them though.
i should sleep. Wake up early. Do things that need to get done. Like packing.
Dear god i just want to go home.
I was almost in tears just seeing Erika's away messages saying, Hockessin. I live next to them.
God, home.
695, you are going to be a bitch to me tomorrow. I will fight you the whole way to my exit.
Route 1, you are my straight shot. But you add time, add stupid ppl who can't drive. But i'll take you anyway to avoid I 95.
I just want my bed, my cat. My old life.
What's the point of growing up if i'm miserable?
I'm 20. Fucking 20. I'm just starting to live... and i'm still missing shit.
Chez
ps. If you don't understand me, and what i'm going through. Don't hesitate to ask. Just don't make me cry out of frustration. 2 hours of making my head hurt, isn't giving me an closure.