I like the quiet, when I can get it. I like the feeling that I am content alone.
Granted, when things come crashing down all around me then I don't feel so grand.
I want an apartment now. Not this dorm/apartment shit. It's still all college students, there's not so much the dorm aspect but it's a little bit of both.
What I don't want is the responsibilities of having my own apartment. That right there would be crowning glory of me "moving out" of my house and my mother would jump on me like a leopard.
What's sparking this is my terror of living with Vicki and Beth next year, no not year... but now a month and a half. Where the hell is my time sense?
They called from Colorado, giving me the details of how goreous it is, how much fun their having, the drinking, the ride, how much I suck from not being there... yada yada...
I'm sorry I have other responsibilites at the moment. Its called "I can't graduate at the same time as you".
If I could go and travel I would in a heart beat.
No, scratch that... I would make sure I'm finacially secure, know where I'm going, and plan everything out.
I've found out that I hate spontenaity. I'm not sporatic. I can't just jump up and do something with out planning.
Like the tattoo I plan on getting. I was going to do it around my birthday. Then funds proved to be no good... and then just didn't get the time to go.
Now I have "time". Depending on whether or not I'm working/class/studio.
Like tonight, I was in the stuido. I was in the studio last night.
Last night my prof Rich comes up to me and asked me,"Have you had a vaction yet?" I go on about what's been happening, and he asks me again, and then I tell him, "No. I've had no life, like what I've listed."
He expects me to have a cocktail in hand with a little umbrella, sitting around, and watching raku on Sunday.
The day I bring a drink around a kiln is the day that I might want to dig a grave.
I've had one burning experience will sober w/ raku, I'm not letting any chances with my hair this time. No no, five inches of burnt hair was enough for me.
Firing isn't the hard process, it's the combustable part that's tricky. When you pull a pot hotter than the sun, and put it into paper(or anything that burns) that's in a tin trash can... you better be carefull of the flames that leap up.
So, I've learned my lesson the hard way.
As for taking a vaction, that won't happen till August. I have to take my praxis exam (teaching test also like the SAT? then I can go home and enjoy something called summer.
Jesus, that reminds me I have to find my ticket...Shit. Fuck... I have no clue where it'd be. Oh yeah, and I have to study for it. But if I can't find the god damned ticket no point to studying.
chez