Why??
I shouldn't have read Kristin's diary... cuz it only made me feel worse about the whole ATAC shit. Why can't i just drop it and live my fucking life!! They seem to haunt me!! I can't get away from them... they do nothing for me... Nothing!! They didn't even fucking say good bye... why kind of friends are they... and it makes me soo mad!! Thrusday night they went parting!! When i was home... by myself.
I just can't let it go...
How can i? They were my friends. Heh... yeah were...
I called Sara last night... she felt bad that she couldn't say good bye... and she planned on doing something w/ me... but needless to say it didn't get done, cuz i left early this morn'.
Chris is taking a nap... i feel lonely... and i wanna go somewhere... but i'm scared to. She's so welcoming to ppl. I'm welcoming, but carefull about it. Trust isn't something to waist.
eviIcookieeIf(erika): enjoy your new freedom
Yeah... freedom... Yes, freedom from my parents, from my brothers... but never the past. And i hate how it keeps reminding me how abnormal i am. I'm not normal... i accept that. How can i not? I know how it feels to get the wrong vibes from someone... we all do it. So, why deny it.
I'm getting way off the subject.. and yet it's kinda not.
My group... *sighs and shakes head* we were never really accepted... acknowledge yes... but never accepted. No wait... let me change that, We were Tolerated.
And it hurts me to be left out from ppl who i consider Tolerated!!
It hurts.
CheZ